As we approach the 27th day in our self-care series, it’s important to recognize and acknowledge that priorities shift. Balancing various responsibilities can be challenging, and sometimes, certain tasks must take precedence over others. This reality is why it has taken me nearly two months to publish 30 posts on self-care.

Navigating a Busy Life

Summertime brought a significant change in my routine. All my kiddos are home now that school is out for the summer. This means a bit more interruption in my day-to-day! My Ph.D. courseload doubled, meaning I was juggling four classes instead of the usual two. Yes, I work full-time and am a full-time student. No offense to my faithful readers, but writing term papers demanded more time and energy, leaving me too exhausted to write blog posts. One of the classes was quantitative statistics, followed by advanced quantitative statistics. Although I strive to maintain a growth mindset, I struggle with IBM SPSS software. I can interpret the results adequately with considerable time and effort, but it usually takes me about 90 minutes to answer a single assigned question. With 6 to 8 questions each week, and each question having multiple sub-questions, it quickly became time-consuming to say the least.

The Need for Flexibility

I share this to emphasize that even though I am back to my regular courseload of two classes, the homework remains demanding. I had to shift my priorities, be flexible, and accept that some things, like writing blog posts, had to take a backseat. As life eases up and I have more discretionary time, I will resume publishing more consistently.

It’s essential to recognize that self-care often involves adjusting priorities. Sometimes, this means allowing certain tasks to relax while you focus on more pressing matters. It’s better to let something go temporarily than to burn the candle at both ends trying to do everything.

For me, focusing on coursework and managing my workload were critical. I have to be more present for my family. And I still have to be a wife and homemaker. By accepting these shifts, I made sure that I didn’t compromise my well-being or burn out. An empty cup can share with anyone else. It may have taken me decades to learn this lesson, but it is one I won’t ever forget. This approach is a valuable lesson in self-care: understanding when to push and when to pause.

Practical Tips for Managing Shifting Priorities

1. Assess and Reassess: Regularly evaluate your priorities and adjust them based on current demands and circumstances. It’s okay to change your priorities! It’s a natural process as a parent. Newborns take way more physical attention than teenagers. Toddlers require more mental awareness. And teenagers – well, teenagers require more emotional attention (and chocolate!). We recognize that ebb and flow with our children more easily than we do with ourselves.
   
2. Communicate: If you’re overwhelmed, communicate with those who depend on you. Let them know your situation and adjust expectations. I am beyond blessed to have a husband that makes sure I eat and helps with the laundry and gives me a hug when I burst into tears over some statistical problem I cannot get to work. (In my defense, it was a problem with the software and not the user – it just took me 3 hours to figure it out and let my professor know!)
   
3. Set Boundaries: Protect your time by setting boundaries. This might mean saying no to additional tasks or delegating responsibilities. Or even something as simple as closing the door to your home office and hanging a “Do Not Disturb” sign (but be prepared for teenagers to just look past the sign). It took some re-educating of my children to “knock” when the door is closed and look for a “thumbs up” or a “thumbs down” before barging into my office.
   
4. Stay Flexible: Be open to change. Flexibility allows you to adapt to new challenges without feeling overwhelmed. When you have good systems in place, it is easy to be flexible within those systems, maintaining productivity and performance balanced with self-care.
   
5. Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself. Understand that it’s okay to not be all things to all people all the time. So often we are are made to feel guilty for doing anything that takes care of ourselves. You are not being selfish; if anything, you are being self-preserving so that you have the resources necessary to care for others.

As we continue our self-care journey, remember that flexibility and adjusting priorities are key. Life’s demands will ebb and flow, and it’s important to recognize when to shift focus. By doing so, you can maintain balance and ensure that you are taking care of yourself effectively. Embrace the changes, and prioritize what matters most to you in the moment.