As we continue our series on self-care, today’s topic is confidence—a quality often admired and misunderstood. Frequently, people who have known me for decades ask how I’ve become so confident. These questions always surprise me because I don’t feel particularly confident. I overthink and second-guess everything! However, the concept of “fake it till you make it” seems to have worked for me.

The Illusion of Confidence

While I do not possess a poker face, I’ve managed to project confidence in many areas of my life. This doesn’t mean I’m always confident; I struggle with doubts and insecurities like everyone else. However, there are aspects where I genuinely feel confident. For example, I believe I am a great mother. I am patient and resilient, understanding that challenging times, whether dealing with toddlers or teenagers, will pass.

I also have confidence in my knowledge gained from work and studies. I know what I know, and I recognize what I don’t know. This self-awareness allows me to ask questions and engage in discussions with anyone about anything, viewing each conversation as a learning opportunity.

A significant part of my perceived confidence stems from my inherent optimism. I believe in seeing the best in people and situations until proven otherwise. Even when someone disappoints me, I judge the individual rather than the entire group. This optimism is deeply rooted in my faith, which influences every aspect of my life.

Faith as the Foundation

My sense of self and optimism find their roots in my faith. I believe in integrating faith into all areas of life, living with integrity, making ethical decisions, and striving for excellence. By focusing on servant leadership, I prioritize the well-being and development of those around me, including friends, family, colleagues, and communities.

Servant leadership involves putting others’ needs first and helping people develop and perform as highly as possible. It’s about fostering a culture of accountability, social responsibility, and compassion. Stewardship, on the other hand, emphasizes managing resources responsibly for long-term, sustainable impact rather than short-term gains. These principles guide my decisions and actions, reflecting my commitment to my values.

The Reality of Self-Perception

Despite appearing confident, I often overthink and second-guess myself. However, I am not afraid to express my opinions or state my dislikes. I value transparency and honesty in my interactions and expect the same from others. This straightforwardness sometimes leads to conflicts, especially with those who lack the courage to communicate directly. Nevertheless, I maintain my stance, driven by the belief that open communication is crucial for healthy relationships.

Ultimately, my confidence is a blend of self-awareness, optimism, and faith. By giving glory to God for making me the person I am, I embrace my strengths and weaknesses. My journey to confidence is ongoing, shaped by experiences, learning opportunities, and a deep-rooted belief in the goodness of life and people.

For those who seek to build confidence, remember that it’s a process. Embrace your journey, learn from every experience, and let your faith and values guide you. Confidence is not about never feeling doubt; it’s about moving forward despite it.